This month, however, I was pleasantly surprised with the relationship section of Women’s Health magazine, was not about romantic interludes, but instead about friendships.  The author, Leslie Goldman, talks about mourning the friendship of her college besty.

It really is amazing how life changes after dorm life. Especially when it comes to friending.  No longer are your friends a mere whiteboard message away.  Once grown-up life begins, it can be truly difficult to sustain those relationships you thought would last forever.  In Goldman’s case, she courted her friend post graduation, but her friend, always on the flakey side, seemed to grow even flakier when the real world came crashing in.

I’ve been feeling the same way about my college friends lately.  Although, I don’t see any of us as the party to blame, I think our lives took different turns.  For starters, I went to school in Boston, while many of my close college friends stayed in New England, I moved home to New York City.  While, they’re not exactly continents away, the distance is enough to make for an out-of-sight-out-of-mind style friendship.

I was really inspired by this article (especially the timing of it), when my college friend and roommate’s mother found me on facebook and asked that I come to Maine for her daughters baby shower in October.  This friend of mine has quite possibly the exact opposite of my life, she eloped our senior year,  moved to rural Maine upon graduating, and within a year was pregnant with her first son.  We’ve emailed back and forth, less than we should probably, but it often feels like we’ve got nothing but the past to keep us intertwined.  She’s pregnant with her second son now, and well, I miss her.  I know we’ll never stay up talking about our dreams and boy troubles again (after all, her married life boy troubles are very different than my single girl boy troubles), but I loved her as a person then, and while our circumstances have changed, that person is worth flying to Maine for a baby shower for.

The ending of Goldman’s story is a good one, she and her college BFF did finally get back together.  It seems that when her college friend became a mother, she also became more respectful of commitments and other peoples time.

If she can have a happy reunion, hopefully, so can I.  I’ll keep you posted on my re-friending adventure when I go to Maine next month.